by Helen Wheatley

As I sit in English teacher Ms. Lindsey Nelson’s room for a free period, I can’t help but be a little bit more than agitated when I look to my right and see a poster that reads, “Happy girls are the prettiest.”

Does it only bother me that this seems to encourage girls to want to be the “prettiest”? Does this mean that sad girls are not as pretty as happy ones? A thousand different moments flash through my head: Don’t eat that, don’t eat this; You have bad skin; Your eyebrows are too bushy; Why does your stomach stick out? Your legs are too big; Your fingers are too fat; What are those marks on your legs? Please don’t do it. Just do it! Why can’t you be more like her? Just be more like her!

The voices seem to scream at you all day, every day, until those voices consume you. You ask yourself why you don’t look right, as if it’s your fault that you look the way you do; as if it’s your fault the world tells you not to be yourself! Let me tell you something: it’s not your fault. Next time any of those thoughts enter your head, think of this:

When you look at yourself in a mirror, do not be irked by the way your thighs rub together. When you see a couple more little purple stretch marks surfacing on your skin, do not be ashamed. Love and embrace them! They are what make you unique! You are worth so much more than what’s on the outside. If you look down at your wrists and see those pale-white scars, be happy that you have made it to where you are.

When a boy tells you, “Sara was prettier than you.”, do not be ashamed of yourself. Let it be known to him that you are not an object to be toyed with– you are a woman! There is so much more that goes into a woman’s beauty besides her outward appearance. People too often give value to others based on their aesthetic appearance rather than their character. When you reach for a few more chips, and your mother tells you, “Careful, darling, you don’t want those extra calories!”, eat them if it pleases you. Embrace yourself! Do not be afraid to love who you are!

In her autobiography Sassypants, well-known American comedian Tina Fey describes the outlandish standards women are expected to live up to by depicting society’s “perfect woman” to have “Caucasian blue eyes”, “full Spanish lips”, “hairless Asian skin with a California tan”, “long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet”, “the hips of a nine-year-old boy” and “the arms of Michelle Obama” among other less than appropriate expressions. Fey had it right. Who says everyone has to be a Barbie doll? These expectations are highly unrealistic, and nearly impossible to accomplish in a healthy way.

Lastly, attempt to change the way you think. After all, we are society. If we continue to judge those with the many characteristics we despise in ourselves, we get nowhere. According to news magazine The Observer, at five, children begin to understand other people’s judgement of them. At seven they’re beginning to show body dissatisfaction. Think of your younger brother or sister, or even of your future child. Do you not wish for them to love themselves? Let’s make sure that kids don’t grow up with a preconceived notion of what is beautiful. It is up to us! I urge you to make the choice now to stop judging others with the very things that bring us down. After all, we hold the power to change the world.