by Siobhan Miller 

Written from the perspective of an overconcerned teacher. 

As students file into class, I glance down at their uniforms: white polo, length-appropriate skirt (three inches above the knee, of course), and either black or white socks. After nodding approvingly at each student, I freeze, eyes caught on a small checked patterned decorating a students socks. I call out to her, stating, “Your socks are out of uniform.” The student glances back at me with a ‘what’s wrong with that?’ look and continues her work. Frustrated, I call her to my desk and fill out a small pink detention slip. “Don’t let it happen again,” I warn.

Nearly every day, students wear out of uniform socks, despite the Student Handbooks rule that they must only wear “clearly visible solid black or solid white socks” (second paragraph, fourth bullet point). Although the instructions are direct, students disregard these rules as if they are less significant than wearing an STA polo or having a length appropriate skirt. These rules are obviously of equal importance!

I roll my eyes before greeting a new group of students into class. A sea of white polos and tartan plaid rush past me, interrupted only by a single pair of Nike Elite socks. Neon! Clearly neon! The student didn’t even make an effort to disguise this infraction. I call the student to my desk and open the handbook I keep in my desk. I point my finger on paragraph two bullet point number four and glance up at the student. She glances back at me with a confused look, but I know she recognizes her wrongdoing. After several seconds of silent stares, I reach for another detention slip and see the student roll her eyes. “It’s just socks!” she exclaims. “Just socks? Just socks! Next it will be just polos or just skirts,” I retort. I fill out the slip and send the student to her seat.

“None of the other teachers care!” “You can barely see them!” “Why does it matter?” I’ve heard all the excuses in the book. Having different colored socks can distract from the rest of the uniform, not to mention give students a sloppy appearance! By wearing uniform approved socks, you are sure to have a nice, polished look. I smile at the thought and sit down at my desk, waving a new group of students in.

I try to avoid glances down to their socks, hoping to avoid potential disappointment. But in a moment of desperation, my eyes can’t resist spotting a pair of navy socks peeking out from a pair of tan Uggs. I shout out the students name before sitting down and pulling out yet another pink slip, circling “uniform infraction.”