by Erin Sellers

I am a corrupter. My friends would agree, and tell you about all of their time I have wasted, all of their study habits I have broken. You see, I am The Devil – lovely to meet you. I perch on my friends’ shoulders and lure them into a dark abyss. They do not return.

I introduce people to TV shows. Yes, I can hear you screaming in terror.

Let me explain, and after, look up from perusing this amazing website (dartnewsonline.com), and back away if I am the said room. It’s for your own good.

I watch a lot of, what I consider, quality TV. But I’m not content to know that my TV life is better than most peoples. No, I suggest to a friend, “Hey, you don’t watch ‘Mad Men’ do you? Well start. NOW.” Some may wonder if this qualifies as a suggestion. Of course it does.

Now you’re thinking, “She can’t be THAT persuasive.” Just you wait. I don’t stop at polite suggestions. Many times I force my friends to watch a few episodes of the show. You know, just five hours or so. If they don’t feel attached after that, I back off – and only make them watch another four hours. If they do decide to follow my advice, I insure that it doesn’t stop with me; the people I get hooked capture others, spreading my destructiveness faster than the rumor of free food at STA.

You still believe I’m over exaggerating. I’m trying to be amusing. Feast your eyes on the tangible evidence of my toxic habits. Following is a list of TV shows I recommended and the people who fell under my persuasion.

Community – Celia O’Flaherty, Kate Rohr, Maddie Dang (via Kate Rohr)

Mad Men – Katie Hyde, Kate Rohr, Stephanie Hampel (via Kate Rohr)

True Blood – Katie Hyde, Kate Rohr, Maddie Dang

The Vampire Diaires – Katie Hyde, Kate Rohr, Elaine Schmidt, Celia O’Flaherty, Christina Barton

Castle – Celia O’Flaherty

New Girl – Mr. Fast, Katie Hyde, Libby Hyde, Mark Hyde

Storage Wars – Katie Hyde, Libby Hyde

As you can see, I’ve reached those you might consider incorruptible. Stephanie Hampel? Yes, she may roll her eyes every time a sexist comment is made in “Mad Men” ( which is every 15 seconds) but still, she’s watching.

Elaine Schmidt? Introduced over service week, practically finished with season two. Christina Barton may appear to have it all together (and actually does) but she’s just as torn between the Salvatore brothers as the rest of us “VD” watchers. Mr. Fast? I kept insisting he give “New Girl” another chance. Guess what he watched over spring break? Kate Rohr is like the right-hand demon I’ve always wanted, my proudest achievement. Poor Katie Hyde, I’ve quite literally ruined her life.

What have I learned? That I should stop; people don’t need any more distractions. But you know what? Too bad. Their lives have been GREATLY improved by the shows I’ve recommended. I have given them new reason to live.

And no, I won’t take a suggestion from someone else. As The Devil, I am all knowing in certain areas (television for example) and I already know the show you’re going to suggest. It’s crap. But if you’re ever in need of something to watch, I may have a suggestion or two for you. Ignore me at your own risk.

Final Say: Don’t talk to me about TV unless you’re willing to get roped into several new shows and lose at least twenty hours of your life.