by Kate Rohr

This weekend I traveled to Minneapolis, Minnesota to attend the National Scholastic Press Association conference for student journalists, and it was awesome! But what was EVEN more awesome? The eight-hour drive from KC to Minneapolis. Oh yeah. Eight. Hours. So what did 32 teenage girls do during this voyage? We watched movies! So get ready for reviews of some childhood classics. First up? “The Lizzie McGuire Movie.” Oh yeah.

I hadn’t seen “Lizzie McGuire” in several years, so watching it brought up some nostalgia for those Disney Channel days. I recommend that if “Lizzie McGuire,” whether it be the TV show or the movie, was a big part of your childhood, watch it again! If it wasn’t, then… you probably shouldn’t.

If I were a serious movie critic, (HA!) I would tell you that “The Lizzie McGuire Movie” is an awful film that should be banned for its mere ridiculousness. I would mention the absurd idea that Lizzie McGuire (Hilary Duff), who is supposedly fourteen during this movie, would be left in a hotel room in Rome for a week because she was ‘sick.’ And I would have to comment on how horrible all the Italian accents are. And I would definitely have to acknowledge that the acting is… it’s just bad. Really, really bad.

So good thing I’m not a serious movie critic, because I still enjoyed “The Lizzie McGuire Movie” immensely! I love the characters, from the evil Kate Sanders to the clueless Ethan Craft to the intimidating Ms. Ungermeyer. And come on, just look at Paolo, Lizzie’s Italian boyfriend! Sure, his accent is shameful, and his lines are laughable, but they’re also lovable (“You shine like the light from the sun.” It’s practically Shakespeare.) Lizzie herself is sort of a phenomenon in the land of Disney Channel: she’s a normal, awkward, self-conscious teenager. That’s it, and that’s why we love her. She can’t see into the future, she doesn’t have a twin brother or live in a hotel, and she only has a double life as a pop star for one night. Then she goes right back to reality, to a life that every Disney Channel addict understands. And even when Lizzie has this crazy romance with an Italian pop star, cartoon Lizzie is right there to remind you of just how normal she is inside. No one does teen angst better than cartoon Lizzie, or at least not as enjoyably.

And the soundtrack. Oh goodness. There’s not much I can say. Who among us doesn’t know every lyric, or the every corresponding dance move? I can’t even say “hey now” to a friend without immediately hearing “this is what dreeeams are made offff.”

That moment when 32 girls sang in unison that they’ve got “somewhere I belong” was when I understood the value of “The Lizzie McGuire Movie.” It’s not a good movie at face value, but a nostalgic bit of our childhoods. “Why Not?” and “Hey Now” will forever be stuck in my head, and I will never stop wishing that a cartoon me would melt into the floor every time I say something stupid. So on my usual rating scale, “Lizzie McGuire” gets like a 3.5. But perhaps on a different scale, say, a scale of how wonderfully nostalgic a film is, “Lizzie McGuire” gets a solid 27 on a scale of one to ten.