Day one, as I stood in my kitchen, rummaging through the cabinets, I mentally noted all the food I could no longer eat. Well, that’s not exactly right. I noted all the food that in choosing to go vegan I would therefore choose to avoid.

Veganism was your “fun” idea, my hungry stomach accused my willfully determined brain. In spite of my hunger’s lack of cooperation, I wanted to challenge my will power and do a test run before college when I figured I would make the transition permanently. I opened my refrigerator and ran through all of the major non-vegan foods to avoid.

No meat.

Easy. I have been a vegetarian for a while now so that will not be a problem at all, I thought to myself. Check.

No eggs.

Fine, I have always hated them anyway. Except that means no to most cakes, cookies and other desserts. Well, I can always make vegan versions of those, I rationalized ignoring the truth that I am essentially a fire hazard in the kitchen. Still, check.

No dairy.

I prefer almond milk to cow’s milk any day, but that also means no cheese, no yogurt and definitely no ice cream, basically the three tenets of my diet. I suppose this is the challenge that I wanted. Half-hearted check.

No honey.

What? I don’t understand why not. Vegans are crazy. But I guess I can’t call myself one without following the rules completely. Begrudging check.

For two weeks, I tried to follow my plan. I cheated the first day with some delicious (and worth it) Italian cookies. Generally, I fought my toughest cravings during the afternoon. After a long afternoon of Pre-calculus anddeterminedly avoiding treats STA girls would unknowingly tempt me with with, my resolve would be lacking. Sometimes when I went home, I would just stare into my cabinets at our chocolate stash, Cheez-its, and all the other non-vegan delights of my former diet. Now, at the end of my semi-successful experiment, I recognize one of the chinks in the armor of my plan.

Despite all that careful consideration, I failed to realize how difficult it would be to stick to veganism at STA, the mecca of all delicious, dairy-filled desserts. On the first day of my vegan adventure, I was tempted with a buttery looking dessert before period one even started. When lunch rolled around, I had quickly progressed to the stage where my judgement was so impaired by the lack of chocolate, that when I saw a Reese’s lying on the ground, I had to stop and seriously consider my options. I was with a friend, so I left the Reese’s as it was. I shudder to think what would have happened if I had been alone, which leads me to another realization about transitioning to veganism. I needed a partner in this task. I needed someone to keep up my morale and steer me away from chocolate lying on the ground.

Although ultimately I failed in my attempt at living a vegan life, I still plan on making the transition permanent in my future. If that’s college, then maybe I will return to my vegan diet sooner than I anticipate. If not then, I’ll figure it out later. Throughout these two weeks, I put too much pressure on myself to be a true vegan, and for what purpose? My own self satisfaction? When I become a vegan later, I will not restrict myself so harshly and feel as guilty when I break my own rules. I will buy my own vegan food, find supporters and laugh at myself when I just cannot possibly resist that proffered frosted brownie.