Many of my friends call my obsession/hobby/past time, whatever you want to call it, creepy. Many of you will probably think the same thing, but I am not concerned with the critics. I am not afraid for people to learn about my ‘hobby.’ I read obituaries. Everyday. I do not know how I started or why I started for that matter, but every day I sit down and read the obituaries in the Kansas City Star. Although I do not read all of the obituaries, my reading is not always random. I am, for some strange reason, drawn to obituaries that end up revealing relatives of the deceased as someone I know. I often know when an STA student’s grandparent, aunt, uncle, or cousin dies because I see their name as a survivor of the deceased.
I can see why my friends think I am strange or think that I stalk people. For me though, reading obituaries is a personal thing. Since my aunt died in 2006, I understand the pain people go through. In a matter of four months, two boys in my grade at St. Peter’s lost their moms to cancer and I lost my aunt to cancer. The difficulty of going to three funerals, to see so much sadness, made me realize how everyone goes through the same thing. I realized many people lose their lives every day and many people suffer through those losses.
I also saw how lucky my family was to have so many people who cared about us when we needed support. I saw the droves of people who came to my aunt’s wake, all who were somehow affected by her, who want to remember her. Not everyone is so lucky. Many people do not have a lot of family or friends to remember them when they are gone. Reading the obituaries gives me an outlet to pray for those who have lost their lives and give their lives the recognition they deserve.
Obituaries welcome me to recognize those who have gone before me, to give respect to those suffering from the loss of a loved one. Even though I did not know either of the St. Peter’s mothers well or was not extremely close with my aunt, the pain and heartache was the same. Someone is gone from your physical life, but at the same time, they are still with you. Not a day goes by when I don’t think “What if she didn’t die?” or “What if he didn’t have to suffer that loss.” Yet, looking past the “what ifs” and accepting reality drives me to continue reading obituaries. I pray for those who have lost someone they love, knowing I would want the same thing for myself if someone in my family died. Although they may be depressing, the obituaries give tribute to the lives people led and the new life they will now lead in heaven. I want to support that. Yeah it may be really creepy when I tell my friends Suzie’s great uncle died and Jill’s cousin died, I won’t stop reading obituaries. I want to know when those people die. I may not actually say anything to them (they would be very creeped out if I gave them my condolences, especially if they have no idea who I am), but I will continue to pray for them. Dr. Joe always said he read the obituaries to make sure he was still alive. And while that is not my intention, it is good to know I am not alone in my obituary reading habit. Join the club and you may discover something about yourself or your faith you never knew before.
Final Say: Reading obituaries gives an outlet to pray for others and give people the recognition their lives deserve.
