My younger sister Maggie came up to me two weeks ago with a supposedly autobiographical paper she had written for her English class.

Maggie, my baby sister, my playmate, my friend, completely libeled me in the story. It reads as follows:

Don’t Fall in the Lava

It was a typical day for my five year old self; waking up, going to preschool, learning my abc’s, then my after school activities. I was a busy little kid; school, gymnastics, dance and soccer. That night, I arrived home and things were about to change.

My sister Cara and I decided it would be fun to jump across the room from bed to bed. Even though our mom told us many times not to jump on our beds, it still seemed like a good idea. There were many rules to this little game of ours; the ground was lava, you had to jump feet first and there was no telling Mom about it.

I was getting quite good leaping from one bed to another avoiding the lava. Cara, on the other hand, fell into the boiling hot lava several times but managed to survive. Of course, I had argued with her about this, but we moved on.

I was growing tired, every lead became harder. I jumped off my bed, hoping I would make it. I fell just a few inches short of the bed. Not only did I die in the lava, but I also broke my left arm.

My first thought was, ‘How could I let Cara win?’ The pain kicked in, and then the tears started. Cara sat there in her victory, staring at me. After she finally realized something was really wrong and that my tears were real, she ran to get my parents. They rushed me to the hospital.

As I sat there in the waiting room, I was debating what color cast to get. Not sure what to do I, I get called back. I was petrified, this being my first trip to the hospital. Satisfied with my color choice, I walk out with a bright blue left arm.

Not only did I learn that lava hurts, but to listen to my mother. She told us countless times to never jump on our beds. Only if I had listened to my mom…

Ridiculous, right? There are SO many inaccuracies Maggie unabashedly threw in there to ‘make it more exciting.’

1. Maggie was correct in the fact that she was in preschool when it happened, but she was younger than five.

2. She broke her arm in the morning, not the night.

3. I was NOT there when it happened. I was in school.

4. We did not play lava in our bedroom. We played it in our computer room, jumping off of chairs and the piano bench not beds. Also, I was and still am a talented lava player, not as Maggie portrayed me to be.

5. Maggie’s trip to the hospital when she broke her arm was not her first. She was obviously born in a hospital. With a nurse as a mom, Maggie went to see the doctor in a hospital for check-ups on a biannual basis.

6. What really happened was, Maggie was alone in her room on her bed. Somehow she rolled off and landed on a wooden American doll bed below. That’s what really broke her arm, not how she said it happened in this fantastically libelous story she created.