story by Natalie Fitts and Sara-Jessica Dilks, photos by Libby Hyde and Maria Donnelly

As the only all-boys school and one of only two all-girls schools in Kansas City, Rockhurst High School and St. Teresa’s Academy have naturally been connected since their beginnings: through families, grade school friends, neighborhood proximity and extracurricular events.

STA theology teacher Michael Sanem was aware of the schools’ close connection when he was a Rockhurst student and dating his current wife, Megan Diamond, an STA alum.

“I remember thinking STA was the female equivalent of Rockhurst,” Sanem said. “I didn’t know a lot about what happened at STA. We had our separate worlds.”

However, Sanem acknowledges that the relationship between the two schools may have shifted since he was a student.

“I don’t remember there being any rivalry [between STA and Rockhurst],” Sanem said.

One example of the “rivalry” he has seen is Rockhurst students calling STA a daycare.

“I never called STA a daycare,” Sanem said. “That didn’t happen. I respected [STA].”

Last year, the Dart published the opinion piece called “I do not attend a daycare, thank you,” written by now-senior Maddie Knopke. The column was Knopke’s response to hearing Rockhurst students call STA a “daycare.”

The responses came quickly.

On DartNewsOnline, the column received over 20 comments from both Rockhurst and STA students and alumni.

The origin of Rockhurst nicknaming STA a “daycare” is likely related to the difference in class structure and discipline between the two schools, according to Rockhurst senior Jack McHugh.

“When I think of STA, it seems like there’s a lot more fun at school, more free time and there’s always something new going on that’s not [academically]-related,” McHugh said.

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STA literature teacher Katie Dolan believes that when STA girls talk about school to Rockhurst boys, they only discuss the fun, non-academic aspects.

“Sometimes when [the girls] tell stories like ‘I was in a free and blah blah blah,’ you also don’t mention that you’re sitting there working on your trig homework,” Dolan said. “[The Rockhurst boys] think you’re just sitting around, laughing with your teachers … They hear [those stories] and think that class doesn’t really exist.”

Rockhurst senior Robbie Healy, who has grown up running around the STA campus and knows several current teachers, says the jokes are purely a way to show they like STA students.

“It’s the way of showing we like you,” Healy said. “Guys do it to each other too.”

Rockhurst senior Connor Prochnow added that the remarks from Rockhurst students should not be taken seriously.

“We can make all the jokes we want, but very deep down we actually do appreciate [STA girls],” Prochnow said. “We joke because we care. If we chose to not even talk or joke [about STA] at all, that would mean we didn’t like you.”

Another area where a gender inequity or rivalry between Rockhurst and STA appears is at out-of-school events, according to Prochnow. At Rockhurst dances, the Rockhurst students have been known to chant “Rock State!” at some point during the night. Similarly, STA students commonly switch the words of Miley Cyrus’s song “Party in the USA” to “Party at STA” at dances or mixers. Both instances are examples of the brotherhood or sisterhood from each school carrying over to extracurricular events, according to Connor.

“At Rockhurst, there’s the whole brotherhood thing,” Prochnow said. “You go through all this stuff together with your bros…Kairos, getting JUGs [punishments known as Justice Under God], the teachers showing you [disappointment]. So there’s a sense of allegiance.”

Just like the Rockhurst boys do, some STA girls ensure that the insults are simply light-hearted. Sophomore Machella Dunlea, whose boyfriend is Rockhurst sophomore, said that the remarks are not malicious.

“[My boyfriend] has a lot of homework, and I get a lot of mine done in frees,” Dunlea said. “If I don’t have any homework sometimes he’ll make fun of it. But I think it’s harmless. They all love to just joke around about it…he acknowledges that this is a hard school.”

However, some people, including Sanem, view the rivalry to be a relatively serious issue. He sees the STA-Rockhurst relationship as a “microcosm of gender inequity [in today’s society].”

“It sounds like [the rivalry] is beyond the point of just ‘boys will be boys,’” Sanem said. “It just seems so sexist. For me, it’s disappointing that that’s going on because it’s certainly not he mission of the Jesuits to [foster] young men who behave like that.”

Based on what he has seen, Sanem acknowledges that it is not a one-sided issue and STA girls have the ability to stop some of the negative comments.

“In my social concerns class, one girl brought up how she was on the phone with a Rockhurst boy and [he] called [STA] a daycare and she didn’t know what to say to that,” Sanem said. “[STA girls’ comeback should be] that this isn’t a daycare. I’m not a babysitter. You aren’t babies. You aren’t children. Why do you not have any reply to that? Why would you allow stuff like that to be said?”

McHugh points out that despite the conflicts and natural competition that may occur between Rockhurst and STA, the two schools’ connectedness is beneficial overall for all students.

“The most positive thing about the relationship [between STA and Rockhurst] is the fact that there are two single-sex schools that are closely connected, which makes adolescence more normal for both parties since both are [deprived of] the other gender,” McHugh said.