by Kathleen Keaveny
As I sat by the Brookside trail and stretched with fellow freshmen I barely knew, I heard seniors and juniors that knew my older sister talking about me in their stretching circle.
“Did you see that Keaves’s sister is here?”
“I can’t wait to see her run. I bet she is really fast too.”
“I wonder if Elizabeth helped her train this summer.”
It was cross country tryouts. I did not want to try out, but my mom and sister convinced me that it would be a good way to make friends freshman year and I might find that I am actually good at it. My mom kept telling me that if my sister who is 5’3” can run fast, then so could I, all 5’8” of me. It’s in the blood, they all say. Well, it turns out that it’s not.
My sister, Elizabeth Keaveny, ran cross country and track for STA and still holds the 5k record. She ran varsity for a Division 1 school in Oregon and married a fellow varsity runner. If you can’t tell already, she likes to run and she is pretty darn good at it.
I knew that I wasn’t fast and I tried to tell people that, but they didn’t listen. They said I was being modest, but I was just being honest. The team only believed me after I threw up about 20 yards before the finish and finished second to last. I didn’t make the team to say the least.
I’m not my sister. My name is actually Kathleen not, “Elizabeth’s Sister.” I still get asked on a regular basis, “Are you Elizabeth’s sister?” and “Do you run too?”. I’m happy that people know and like my sister, but it gets pretty old explaining to people that I can’t run. I have my own interests and talents. I am an individual and I want people to know me for who I am and not who they think I am.
The spring of my junior year, I was convinced to try out for the track team to high jump. Not run, high jump. As I walked up to Coach Hough and the jumping coach to tell him I wanted to high jump, Hough pointed at the back of my swim team sweatshirt which said “Keaveny” on it. He said to the jumping coach, “That name is all over the record boards.” Here we go again. I make my usual explanation and tell him I am not a runner. He responds, “It has got to help. It’s in the blood, isn’t it?”
Going into high school is scary in general, but it was a lot scarier knowing that people have high expectations for me. Expectations that I know I can’t possibly fulfill because they do not involve my interests, talents or abilities. I set goals for myself, but they are not the same goals that my sister had for herself. I am proud of my sister and her accomplishments. I am also proud of my accomplishments.
Coming to STA as a legacy can suck at times, so give those girls a chance to show you their expectations for themselves instead of making assumptions about them.
To all those living in a shadow, it is important to change people’s minds about you. Don’t settle with people making assumptions about your identity. It can be hard to get that across to people but it just forces you know who you are and develop your own identity.
Now that I am a senior, most people at STA know me for me. There are a lot of girls at STA though who have older sisters and have gone through similar experiences as I have. They are not molds of their older sisters. They are individuals. They have names. Give them a chance to show you who they really are.