To Whom It May Concern,
Like most STA girls I look forward to the days when I walk into my advisory and there is a stack of The Dart waiting for me. However, as I flipped through November’s issue I came upon an article entitled ‘There might be a reason we make a big deal about our male teachers’¦’ and I was a little embarrassed.
At first I thought it would just be another article listing the various adventures of STA’s fabled ‘bromances’Â, as I read it though I became increasingly frustrated. Phrases like ‘stalker pics’Â and words like ‘attractive’Â jumped out at me. I do understand that the article was meant in a joking way and most of it was amusing!
However, what truly angers me is the fact that I witness girls take this joking about our male teachers way too far. These are our teachers! Men who came to this school to teach, not be ogled by teenage girls. I find it extremely disrespectful and unfair for any one of these men to have to be subjected to pointless gossip.
I admit I am not innocent when it comes to discussing the male teachers. These conversations are never centered on their looks and I can proudly say I have never taken part in the picture taking referenced in the article. I believe the key word when it comes to our male teachers is ‘respect’Â.
Male teachers are put in a precarious position teaching at an all girls school, especially one as relaxed as STA. It’s not uncommon to see a student having a conversation with a teacher that goes beyond just academics. When it comes to male teachers they must go out of their way to balance this casualness with a set of boundaries. They should be applauded for keeping a sense of humor and patience about this particular issue because personally, I would’ve broken long before now.
Just like any other students, my friends and I love joking around with Egner or Whitney, talking music and movies with Fast, Himes or Shrock and chatting with Thomas or Sirridge. However, we all agree that it makes it awkward now to try and initiate a conversation with a male teacher simply because we don’t want it to appear as if we have a crush on them.
If the situation was reversed and students at an all male school put as much energy into discussing and ‘stalking’Â their female teachers as much as we do our male teachers it would be considered a far more pressing issue. St. Teresa’s Academy should be a place of equality and feminism, not double standards. All teachers at STA should be treated with dignity, whether they are male or female.
This letter may seem like an overreaction and maybe it is, but my frustrations have simply gotten the best of me. If you want to take anything from this letter at all, let it be to stick to the good natured (and appropriate) joking around and don’t let it evolve to an uncomfortable and disrespectful level. A little respect goes a long way.
Sincerely,
Anonymous
Anonymous 2 • Dec 2, 2009 at 9:15 pm
Elle, I have read the article and both comments. I do not agree with your response to the letter. I think it was quite rude and immature considering the circumstances. Saying that this person basically did not have the right to write a letter “that mean” is wrong. This is a newspaper. Part of what keeps the newspaper running is the students and the feedback the staff gets. People are supposed to be encouraged to share their opinions. I understand that this letter made you feel threatened and you seemed to think it was an over reaction. But to be honest, it’s her opinion. Not yours. No one says you have to agree with it, but it is disrespectful to react the way you did. She certainly has the right to voice a response to an article and she should not be told that what she did was wrong. I think it was a well thought out letter. She did not mean any disrespect by it, but she wanted students to think twice about what they say. To be honest, I was seriously disappointed when I read your comment. This letter had valid points and was well organized. It was not “trashing” anyone, and the author clearly mentions this. It is perfectly okay for you to disagree with what she has said, but even if you don’t agree with her, she deserves respect just like anyone else. Don’t get me wrong, it’s great that you have shared your opinion, and I am not criticizing it. I just think you need to go about sharing your thoughts in a different way. There is no need to attack her words. People think differently. There is nothing wrong with that. But just be careful about how you approach situations like this. It is extremely important to respect others.
To the rest of the students:
[Respect has become a common issue at our school lately and it is unacceptable. This is definitely something that a lot of people need to work on. I am hoping this can change with effort. Because honestly, disrespect has the power to ruin someone’s day. And you don’t want to be responsible for that, do you?]
Anonymous • Nov 19, 2009 at 5:37 pm
THANK YOU ELLE,
anyways, here are thoughts that i had while reading this
i’m sure if the teachers mentioned in this article were uncomfortable by how we act around them and felt that we were crossing their personal boundaries they would tell us and we would more than likely stop.
Maybe the reason we get along well with them is because they are different than other teachers and are simply fun to talk to, not because we don’t respect them.
I’m sorry if you don’t agree, but I personally have so much respect for these teachers to start with and it only gets greater because of how they allow us to get to know them and want us to be comfortable around them. I appreciate the fact that these teachers talk to us about things not always dealing with school because it makes me more excited to go to class and feel like school does not always have to be serious.
yes, i agree there are times when STA students probably take things a bit too far, but its not because we are creepy or obsessed or its because we like to have fun
honestly, when i read this letter all it did for me was make me think that if you are personally so irritated with how people act just don’t a part in it and if they actually annoyed with how much STA girls interact with them, they will appreciate it… just please don’t make such a big deal about something that was meant as a way to be entertaining and make people laugh
So thank you elle for saying what i thought when i read this letter and thank you male teachers… that sounds weird, but thank you for allowing us to have fun with and get to know you, i’m sure a lot of us appreciate your openness!!!!
Elle • Nov 18, 2009 at 10:01 pm
oh my god, calm down.
i’m sure elizabeth wilson meant no disrespect at all when writing this opinion. and even though you claim you knew that it wasn’t a serious piece in your letter just now, it sounds a lot like the contrary.
and the opinion was just that. an OPINION. if you don’t share the same one, you don’t have to write a letter that seems as mean as yours did. though you may not have intended it, it read as though you were trashing wilson and her ideas.
and this tiny little article is not going to make any teacher act different around the students. and if you think otherwise, i can’t help but assume that you think nothing of their maturity.
I believe the key word when it comes to our male teachers is “relaxâ€Â. they’re just teachers. and people, like you and me.
by the way, i’d be careful with your intensity in this kind of letter, one might think you’re overcompensating for something…