It’s not my fault if my body offends you
The dress code rule against tank tops objectifies students at STA, which should be a safe environment focused on learning and not appearance.
November 5, 2015
I find it odd that St. Teresa’s is so strict on the dress code. I’d rather feel like my body is viewed respectfully instead of objectified.
This seems to happen to us girls a lot these days: on the streets, at parties, on social media and even in our homes. One would only hope that their Catholic, all-girls, women empowering high school might be a safe haven from the constant sexualization of our bodies, but alas, our wants go unheard.
Even clothing items as simple as tank tops are found inappropriate. St. Teresa’s principal of student affairs, Dr. Elizabeth Baker, stated in an email that “bare shoulders are not acceptable non uniform wear…some students may choose to upsize [tank tops sold in the Star Shop] which promotes exposure that we do not condone at STA.”
The “Unacceptable Out of Uniform Days” attire at STA includes: extremely short shorts or skirts, bare backs, shoulders and midriffs, halter spaghetti straps and tube tops.
By implementing these dress code rules, it’s implied that somehow us girls have control over other’s thoughts. If we wear tank tops, we are the cause of teachers, faculty or other students viewing us in a negative, unprofessional or sexual way. But perhaps it could be the ingrained societal norms that encourage primarily men to view us strictly on our appearance. Or maybe – just maybe – boys need to be taught not to sexually harass girls instead of girls being taught that we should be blamed for harassment because of our clothing or body exposure. But hey, what do I know? It’s not like I’m a girl who has been a victim of objectification ever since puberty hit and the world decided all there is to me is my curves and uncontrollable seductive nature.
We aren’t unprofessional based on what we wear. We are professional based on our actions. What’s unprofessional is thinking that somehow our appearance is the deciding factor of our professionalism.
Even Fran Koehler, Assistant High School Division Head for Student Life of Notre Dame de Sion, commented that the only cheeks she wanted to see at the mixer they were hosting were the ones on the girls’ faces. Really? Does the area from my butt to my knees really make you that uncomfortable? Do others really have no control over where they look, or how they perceive what they look at? It’s not my fault if my body offends you.
So here’s my proposal: instead of falling into the dangerous trap of blaming girls for other’s unprofessional behavior or thoughts, learn how to see past our appearance. Let us wear tank tops when it’s 90 degrees outside and the air conditioning doesn’t work in half of our classes. Let us wear short shorts when we’re at a mixer packed full of other dancing, sweaty boys and girls. And lastly, it’s an all girls’ school; we have boobs, we wear bras, it’s no secret, so don’t squirm when you see my sports bra peeking out from underneath my tank top.
Why are you looking there anyway? Most girls in high school aren’t even legal adults yet. But still, we are taught that exposing any given part of our bodies could result in not being taken professionally, or even being taken advantage of sexually. Victim blaming is a dangerous road to go down, especially when those victims are girls in an environment where women empowerment is so prominent.
It was brought to the Dart’s attention that Fran Koehler is wrongly attributed in this opinion piece. Koehler is Assistant High School Division Head for Student Life, not the Dean. The mistake has been corrected. The Dart regrets this error.
Updated Nov. 16 7:50 a.m.
jo ann leach • Nov 11, 2015 at 1:53 pm
Meant to spell that gadflys!
Susan McCarthy • Nov 11, 2015 at 6:37 am
I am an STA alum and an attorney. The one thing in your article I disagree with is your comment that “We aren:t unprofessional based on what we wear”. That really isn’t true-if you want to be treated as a professional you do need to dress like one. Acting like one isn’t enough. You will find that many if not most offices have some kind of dress code and you will need to be aware of it even if it is not written out., or someone will tell you about it. Men don’t have as many options as women do when they select their wardrobe. Women have so many options & styles of clothing that they have to be aware of what is appropriare in a particullar situation.
Laurie Heap MD • Nov 9, 2015 at 11:01 am
I think looking at brain scans and the effects of how women are dressed is an important piece of information for women to consider before getting dressed. The administration of schools should have women read some of the research and ask the question–how do I want to be perceived? Check it out-research done at Princeton–and read through to the end!
JoEllen Redlingshafer • Nov 8, 2015 at 3:37 pm
Jeannie, yeah girl! I agree 100%. Very well said. I’m disappointed in the STA administration.
Taylor rees • Nov 8, 2015 at 2:59 am
Hey, I’m super proud of you for writing this article! This stuff needs to be talked about, and I always felt that our achool’s administration ignored many issues or went about them in the wrong way.
As an alum, it’s good to see that our school has voices that continue to speak for us! I have so much respect for you, jeannie! Go get em!
Nathan Hill • Nov 7, 2015 at 11:46 pm
I really enjoyed this article, and think it brings up excellent points about the objectification of women especially the point you made about the “uncontrollable seductive nature” of women which I would agree is a ridiculous claim.
I do believe there is a bigger problem than just a dress code, but I also think the dress code is not a terrible thing. Agree or disagree, I believe your dress code, as well as my own, helps to set us up for success. I graduated from Rockhurst High School and as you know, we also had dress code. Notable rules included hair guidelines, sock length, shoe type, no jewelry, and no tank tops. Yes, I untucked my shirt immediate after school. Yes, I had a friend who had to put a clear lip ring insert, and yes, I was sent to the dean’s office, had to pay for a single blade razor, and shave more times than I can remember. And I am thankful for that.
Preparing for the career fair this year, I knew what nice meant. My hair was combed, my shoes matched my socks and belt, I was clean shaven and my clothes were wrinkle free. When I stepped in the door that day, I was dressed well. The point of this is simple; Rockhurst dress code prepared me how to dress in the professional world. It also has taught me the discipline to dress well every single day as I will need to be able to do should I wish to interact with clients in my professional career.
I recognize that not everyone needs to wear a tie to work every day. I was really intrigued when I read an article about a St’ Teresa’s alum, Basil Burnette, who said “the career that I’m going into encourages self-expression and tattoos and all that stuff.” So yes, you might not have to dress up every day, but I would be willing to bet that it is a lot easier to dress down than to learn to dress up. I guess my point of the last four paragraphs is that in my opinion, there might be other points to the dress code than just to try and control others thought. I recognize that you might have been talking about special dress days, but in those cases too, we also have to abide by similar rules. On jeans days, even if it was a ninety-five degree day in august, we had to wear jeans, no shorts. This was not some way to cover us up, it was simply abiding to the rules. Yes it is dress down, but I have learned that just because there is a break to the rules doesn’t mean that it because a free-for-all.
Maybe where this conversation goes is to a problem where we judge people on how they dress, I know I am guilty of that, and so is probably anyone else who reads this. The simple fact is, is that in the business world, between two equally qualified applicants, I would higher the clean shaven one over the one with a two day old beard. I think this is a conversation that needs to be had, but I don’t think the meat of it is in the dress code. I wish the schools in the area could work together because the experiences at a school like Rockhurst do not equal the experience at a school like St. Teresa’s, and even from person to person those experience’s change. And unless you can have a personal discussion, where each person can share their thoughts, and WHY they have those thoughts, we will only be addressing the surface and not the root problem. And if you are never exposed to the other side of the conversation, especially the why, then people are going to stick to the beliefs and values they have learned from their own experiences and I fear shut themselves off from things they are told to believe that don’t align with their experiences.
Steph Hampel • Nov 7, 2015 at 7:43 pm
Well said Jean! This conversation is so valuable on so many levels.
Louise Christianson • Nov 7, 2015 at 2:09 pm
This is a very well worded article, Jeanie. The dress code is annoying and ridiculous in many ways. And there are many days that I, and I imagine many other STA girls, wish that we didn’t have such a strict dress code. Why can’t they just enforce appropriateness, but also freedom, in the dress code (for example: no shorts/skirts that show our butts, nothing see-through without anything under it, nothing with big holes….you know, the practical stuff!)??? Who’s with me?!?!?!
Maura Lammers • Nov 6, 2015 at 10:56 am
I wholeheartedly agree with this. Thank you for speaking your mind, Jeannie.
Madeline Cozad • Nov 5, 2015 at 7:53 pm
As an STA alum I thoroughly enjoyed reading this article. The dress code always bothered me, and this article did a great job of pointing out the many issues with it. In other regards, STA is a safe and open space where everyone is respected, so it is baffling that the administration is policing adolescent girls’ bodies in this way. As the author points out, these types of restrictions actually sexualize and objectify girls by claiming that there is something inappropriate or distracting with their bodies. It is completely unacceptable, and I sincerely hope that the administration takes this into consideration and revises the policy. Thank you for this compelling article.